I Can't Let it Go


It's my fault. I'm the foolish person that keeps doing this to myself. I lie to myself about how if I have a small mocha frappe with a shot of espresso at 6 pm that by 12:44 am I will be asleep. Lies. I've been on YouTube catching up with some of my subscriber videos and unsubscribing to some channels that just seem to be cluttering up my feed with random nonsense I truly have no interest in.

I came upon a channel I do appreciate, Matt D'Avella. A minimalist with a refreshing perspective on it all, something about his videos puts me at ease with where I'm at. Like completely judgment free conversations. I appreciate them.

So, it's 12:44 am and I'm quietly watching his latest video on my phone in bed, Ground Up 076 - Letting Go of Stuff w/ Todd Glass. (I would link to the video, but it does have profanity in it, so full disclosure if you'd like to look it up).

And while he, Todd Glass, was talking about his journey into minimalism after watching the Netflix documentary Matt produced the words floated across my mind Somethings I can't let go. 

In the KonMari method she says to get rid of things that give you negative feelings, guilt etc. But somethings I can't let go of that do give me guilt every time I look at them. Example: The 2 books that have been sitting on my bookshelf next to my bed, unread, taunting me. I want to read them, I need to read them, I hope I will read them someday. They're 1. Charlotte Mason's Volume 1 Home Education and 2. Habits. Two very important books that I absolutely cannot just let go of because they bring me guilt, I feel guilt because I need the knowledge that is in those books to be in my head, but I can't read with a house full of 4 kids and retain a single word. I've tried to read them multiple times and I got stuck on repeating the same sentence fifty times trying to understand what I was reading. It felt impossible and gave me a headache. However,those books hold information I need to educate my kids how I want to.



Then there's my "dining room" full of project pieces & tools. I have no garage, the normal place where one might store these items, but I can't just get rid of them because I need them. But they too bring me major guilt, because I can't finish the projects right now for one reason or another. The room also holds a lot of unmade decisions, educational material, craft supplies that I'd like to one day use.

Maybe you think it's a big excuse, but some things in life do come with guilt because it's a reminder that tomorrow counts, too. I can't let go of something today to make it easier on my conscience, when I will definitely need it tomorrow. Not everything at least.

Don't worry, I still have rehomed or thrown out boxes and boxes of other items that I know in my heart I don't need and won't use and it will never bring anything to my life other than guilt. And I don't keep them because I'm worried I can't replace them, but I have already invested money in buying them and I don't plan on changing my educational ideals anytime soon so they're still definitely current taste.

But there are items in our lives that we need to keep and there's this small list of items that are sprinkled about my home that are left there as reminders to myself that I Can't Let It Go. That promise that they represent means too much to me.

Do you have a few items in your home that you can't let go of as well?

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